Moving Forward

"You don't have to have it all figured out to move forward."

I like this quote.  I needed to see those words.  Because, with only three days left in 2014...the new year, 2015, is within reach.  For years my husband and I have been saying that 2015 is the year we'd make a baby.  The past few years we've been focused on my husband's MBA, my husband's career, my career, and saving cash for baby making.

And now just like the quote from Robert Harling's Steel Magnolias, we're saying to ourselves in a loud voice in a quiet room...

"It's time.  Honey, it's time."

My husband and I had an official family meeting to discuss fatherhood.  After the meeting we sent a note to the surrogacy agency informing them we're ready to get on the baby train and we want a meeting to discuss the next steps.

It's overwhelming.  The thought of having a baby is overwhelming to me.

What if I'm not a good father?

We have exceptional nieces and nephews.  What if our kids are duds compared to my brother's girls and my husband's sister's boys?  (Is it wrong for me to even ask that question?)

Right now I have a team of 25 consultants deployed on two continents; how do I fit fatherhood into the mix?  My career is still on the up take.

What if we have children that are super athletic; I don't know how to throw a baseball, football, etc.?

What if, what if, what if...

My friend Anni, who gave birth to her first child this year, sent me a text that gives me hope: "It'll be easy to figure the kid stuff out once the baby gets here.  It was so daunting before it happened, but for us parenthood came easily once Emily arrived.  I'm sure it will for y'all too."

I trust Anne.  So, that's the attitude I'm taking; it'll all work out. We're boarding the baby train and moving full speed ahead.

We're moving forward.