Up

While we were at my parents' house we watched Disney-Pixar's Up. Disney's Bambi has held the top spot since its 1942 release for the saddest opening to a animated movie until now...Up had such a bitter-sweet opening ten minutes. It was very touching, but it was also very sad. As a kid watching Bambi I was disturbed when Bambi's mother got shot by a hunter. As an adult watching Up I am disturbed by how fast a lifetime together can zoom for a couple.

I guess I can relate to the couple in Up. This year, more than any other year, has just zoomed for us. The year is almost over, and it doesn't seem like a year. Where does the time go? In the first ten minutes of Up you zoom through the time-line of the couple. They're young and in love, and then they are old and in love. Life is too short.

White Christmas

We spent Christmas at my parents' house. It was the first time any of us remember having a white Christmas. It was 70 degrees on Christmas Adam, it froze and snowed on Christmas Eve, and we enjoyed a blanket of white snow on Christmas morning. It added magic to the day.

Cinnamon Rolls

I like to make cinnamon rolls on Christmas; it just doesn't feel like Christmas morning without cinnamon rolls for breakfast. It's our family tradition.

Avatar

We went to an IMAX 3-D theater last night to watch Avatar. It was a great film experience. I want to see it again, but I don't know if I'd go to an IMAX 3-D theater again. Both of us got tired of wearing those freaking glasses...the movie is too long to have cheap plastic glasses squeezing your head and rubbing your nose.

It was a beautiful movie to watch, the story was interesting and it had more layers than a normal big-budget Hollywood film. The unexpected surprise in the film was Sigourney Weaver; she was great in this part. It was nice to see her in a big film again.

Go see it, and let's chat...

!Viva Mexico CIty!

Mexico City's Legislative Assembly has approved same-sex marriage! Hooray for Mexico City!!

I thought Mexico was too Catholic to ever give gay people equal rights? I'm so happy for Mexico City. It gives me hope.

I think we should plan a vacation to the city since they are so homo-friendly...

Tis the Season to Party

This time of year is always non-stop. I love December, but it zooms because our schedules are always so full. Here's our weekend recap:

• Friday - we had my office "meat party" at Texas de Brazil
• Saturday - we got to hang out with Presley all day and then we celebrated Christmas with my husband's parents
• Sunday - we drove to my hometown to celebrate Christmas with my large extended family
• Monday - we had a Christmas party at the home of my life-long friend and her husband.
  

It's the busiest time of the year. I have to stop and enjoy the moment.

Car Culture

Here's why public transportation isn't more popular in Dallas...

I am a super commuter. I travel almost 40 miles door-to-door from my home to my office; on average it'll take me less than 50 minutes to get to my office. Last night we had a party close to my office so my husband wanted to take the public transportation to meet me so we'd only have one car. Brilliant idea.

To travel 40 miles on public transportation he had to walk, and then take a bus, a light rail, a train, and once he arrived he had to walk through downtown to my office. This took my husband three hours and cost $6.75.

What takes me less than 50 minutes in a car took him over 3 hours on public transportation.

Bocelli & Blige = Heaven

Stop reading this blog and go directly to iTunes and download Andrea Bocelli and Mary J. Blige's duet What Child is This. If there is music to be heard in heaven, then surely it will sound something like this...download it and crank your speakers and feel the glorious music in your veins. It is beautiful. Merry Christmas to all! ALL. God Bless us all, everyone. EVERYONE.

Oh, Christmas Tree!

Martha Fauker is still claiming her spot under the Christmas tree. We have relocated our gifts to ensure the pretty, pretty Christmas princess keeps her spot!

Uganda wants to kill gay people.

The proposed anti-homosexual legislation being debated in Uganda makes me sad. I am sad for the many gay individuals born in Uganda; if this bill passes they could be jailed or executed for being themselves. I am sad for their unjust struggle.

I am thankful that the world seems to be (in varying degrees) speaking out against this anti-gay law. Even the Vatican (who is usually anti-gay) spoke out against this Ugandan legislation.

Ellen said it best on her blog.

One day we will live in a world where our love is the same. One glorious day that'll be.

The F Word

In the theater version of The Hangover this is how this scene played:

Stu Price: They are mature. You just have to get to know them.
Phil Wenneck: [yelling from outside] Paging Doctor Faggot! Doctor Faggot!
Stu Price: I should probably go.
Melissa: That would be a good idea, Doctor Faggot.

However, I just watched the movie trailer and this is how the scene played:

Stu Price: They are mature. You just have to get to know them.
Phil Wenneck: [yelling from outside] Paging Doctor Douchebag! Doctor Douchebag!
Stu Price: I should probably go.
Melissa: That would be a good idea, Doctor Douchebag.

I guess you can't use the "F" word unless it's in an R-rated version? I am glad for that. I'm also curious what's on the unrated DVD that came out on Tuesday. Has anyone watched the unrated version?

Penguin in the Lobby

The Fort Worth Zoo brought "Domino" the penguin to the lobby of our building and let him run around during the lunch hour. The penguin was wandering one corner of the lobby and attracting a crowd. He was most interested in the escalators, but when he got too close the zoo keeper called his name and he waddled back. It made us all happy to see a penguin in the middle of the day.

The Hangover

The Hangover comes out on DVD and BLU-RAY today and I tempted to call in sick to work so we can watch it all day. I could watch the "wolf pack" speech nonstop.

We are the Champions...

The husband and I completed 95% of our Christmas shopping in six hours on Saturday. It was a bit of self inflicted torture; we knew the stores and the oh-so-beautiful North Park Center would be slammed with Christmas shoppers, but we didn't have a choice. This was the last chance we'd have to shop before Christmas- we're busy people.

We had a list. We had a purpose. We attacked the list together as a team. We don't like shopping. We like buying. We like staying in budget. We felt like champions when we crossed off the last item on our list. We got home and I took the ten-key to the pile of receipt and then we felt poor.

It was an exciting six hours.

Queer Eye for the Straight Guy

On Friday night we attended a lovely holiday party hosted by one of our straight bachelor friends. He is very successful and he has a beautiful home. His home is designed where the entire second floor is for entertaining. It's a great house for hosting a party.

I found it extremely entertaining when I saw a large empty pot of dirt sitting next to his fireplace. I asked him what happened to his plant as I pointed to the pot of dirt sitting next to the fireplace, and he said his plant died a couple of years ago. I asked him if the pot of dirt had been sitting there for two years, and he said yes as we both laughed.

For some reason I thought that was incredible funny. And soooo hetero of him.

Be the change you wish to see in- Texas!

Apparently I spoke to something important when I posted Our love is not a joke on Tuesday. Thank you for all your emails and off-blog discussions! Many of you said you were sorry for us, but no worries. We're used to it. It's just part of our life. We realize we could have an "easier" life if we lived in a blue state; It would be a life where it's unacceptable for a hostess to make a joke about our love. We could move, but we don't want to move; Texas is our home damnit! So we put up with inappropriate remarks in hopes of paving the way for the next generation of gay husbands and wives. We're here. We're queer. We're husband and husband. That's one of the reasons I maintain this blog--- I want to prove that our glorious gay days are just like your hetero non-gay days. Our love is the same.

My husband's cousin Bobby sent me the below email in response Our love is not a joke post and I wanted to share part of the email with you:

*************

Last year, I was in New Orleans and was having lunch at the bar. The bar was in the back of the restaurant, and nearby was the kitchen with a lot of waiter traffic in and out. The floor manager, heaving a loaded tray of dirty dishes, was about to enter the kitchen when the female bartender called out to him, "Glad to see you're doing some honest work." I turned around as he lifted the tray in a "camp" fashion and said, "Yes, I'm having my gay moment." I was furious.

Determined to raise the issue with him, I decided that, rather than confronting him as I walked out, I would tell the bartender. I was afraid that if I told him and him only, he would bury the issue and the point would be lost on the staff. I decided that someone else had to know in order to make sure that the point was made to several people. After I talked to the bartender, who apologized profusely, the manager came over. He told me that he was embarrassed, he was sorry, he was humiliated, and that it was not his intention to hurt me. I assured him that I knew he had not intended to hurt me -- that was the point: casual remarks made unintentionally can be harmful as intentional remarks. I asked him, "Would you say, 'I'm having my Negro moment.' or 'I'm having my Latino moment'?" I think not.

They bought my lunch, which I assured him wasn't the point either. He said, "I know that. It will make me feel just a tiny bit better. Not much, but a tiny bit."

Several weeks ago, I went back to the same restaurant and sat on the same stool. The bartender came over and said, "Welcome back. We're so pleased you have forgiven us. The manager convened a meeting after that episode last year and we had a very serious discussion of what happened. It will never happen again."

I am glad that I spoke up.

*************


I am glad you spoke up too Bobby! I wish I had said something on Tuesday, but some days I want to fight the injustice and other days I just let it be...I think the next time I will follow your approach. Very well played.

Jam Intervention

Yesterday my husband called me out.

He took my hand. He walked over to the Frigidaire. He opened the door. He asked if I thought having EIGHT open jars of jelly/jam/preserves is a bit excessive?!

The thing is- I like a variety of jelly on my toast in the morning; whereas, my husband only likes Welch's squeezable grape jelly if any jelly at all. After asking that confrontational question the husband BANNED me from opening ANY more jars of jams, jellies, or preserves until I finish AT LEAST one that's already open!!

Agreed.

(Note to self: always scatter the jelly in the fridge. It looks worse when all the jars are grouped.)

I did not inform my husband at the time he was preforming his "jelly intervention" that my mother has complained, for decades, about my father having too many jars of jelly/jam/preserves open in the fridge AND she also has complained, for a few years now, when my father dog-piles her pantry space with unopened jars of jelly/jam/preserves.

Do you think there is a "likes-a-variety-of-flavors-on-toast" gene my father gave me with his Y chromosome?

Could be.

Tortilla Soup

My husband made tortilla soup for supper. He used leftover smoked turkey meat and organic chicken broth, and he roasted the tomatoes before he put them into the soup. It was delicious. I love any soup with a clear broth. I thought the photo looked especially timely since it's getting close to Christmas- nothing says Merry Christmas like roasted red tomatoes with green cilantro sprinkles.

Our love is not a joke.

Today I'm at lunch with five of my colleagues. We had finished our meal when the young yellow-haired hostess walks over to seat two businessmen at the table with four chairs next to us. The two businessmen were wearing top coats. It's cold outside. So the hostess didn't know where the men were sitting or if they were putting down their coats in the empty chairs. She said, as a joke: "do y'all want to sit next to each other? Y'all can hold hands!" and she laughed as she handed the two men their menus.

My whole table heard her joke. A few of them looked at me. I rolled my eyes to show my disapproval.

We left the restaurant. We went back to work.

I wish I'd told the stupid girl hostess that she was laughing at my expense. It was not funny. I want to sit next to my husband when we're out to dinner and it's not a joke- it is love.

You can't take it with you

A couple of months ago we went to an estate sale in our neighborhood. The family had built the two bedroom two bath house around 1948 and lived under its roof until last year. They spent a lifetime in this house. The contents of their home were sold to strangers in one weekend, and the home itself was sold within the month.

I love stuff. I enjoy nice things. However, I keep thinking about the fact that once we die our pretty things will just be a dead man's stuff and it can be sold to strangers in one weekend. We spend a life time collecting and it only takes one weekend to liquidate. It really puts things into perspective for me.

Cookie

Our friend Stephanie always gifts us a box of Christmas cookies. They are delicious. Her family has a Christmas cookie baking tradition, and her friends benefit from this cookie tradition. (I love the round balls of peanut butter goodness.)

Oh Christmas Tree

Martha Fauker likes to sit under the Christmas tree. She loves Christmas time...that or we moved one of her dog beds to make room for the Christmas tree. She's claiming her spot with or without a dog bed.

Turkey Talk

Whole Foods has organic cage-free/free-range vegetarian fed turkeys. If we're not going to be vegetarians- we want our meat to be. I was excited because 14 lbs of organic turkey only cost $36- that's a lot of quality meat for only $36. However, my post dinner party attitude towards turkey has shifted. My husband spent five hours of his Sunday afternoon tending to the turkey he was smoking on the grill. FIVE hours! We could have served any other red meat and it would have taking 1/5 of the time and tasted so much better. Cooking a turkey is work. Don't you think?

Cover Dish Dinner

That dinning room table is as "pretty as a picture." I borrowed my mother's Francis the First sterling silver and her beaded chargers, and the flower arrangement is fresh from Central Market. I love dinner parties!

Last night we hosted five other couples for a covered dish dinner. We cooked the turkey, dressing, mashed potatoes, desserts, appetizers, and each couple brought a covered side dish. It's a fun way to have a party because I love the unexpected surprise: you never know what a couple will bring. It was a great way to start the week- with friends, food, and laughter.

Go host a covered dish dinner. It's fun!

60 Years of Love

My grandmother is the beautiful lady in red; my grandfather is the handsome man standing on the right. This photo is circa 1982.

Today is the 60th wedding anniversary for my maternal grandparents. They've been living the happily-ever-after part of life for six decades. It is amazing. They have a beautiful love story.

The Short Version: My grandmother was the daughter of my town's pharmacist; she was the granddaughter of my town's doctor. She graduated high school at age 16, she was advanced, and her parents sent her to Fort Worth to attend Texas Christian University. She was living the good girl life. In walks my grandfather. His daddy was a west Texas cotton farmer. His mother died when he was a young boy. He raised himself. After high school my grandfather worked in the oil fields. One day he was visiting friends and he met my grandmother. They fell in love. They drove to Oklahoma within months of meeting to elope. My grandmother was 17. The judge wouldn't marry her. They drove to the next town and my grandmother had a birthday in route. This judge married the two 18 year old love birds. They kept the marriage a secret.

Once my grandpappy found out that his only daughter was married to a west Texas oil field worker he convinced his son-in-law to attend The University of Texas and become a pharmacist. My grandmother finished her degree at UT, while my grandfather started and finished his degree at UT. Then came my aunt, my mom, and my uncle...and then all those wonderful grandchildren!

Happy anniversary P&C. We love you!

Save-the-date: The husband and I will be celebrating our 60th wedding anniversary in May of 2066. We will be 86 years young! Par-tay! (And hopefully by that time Texas will recognize same sex marriages?!)

Killer Whales Eat Sharks

Shamu could kill (and eat) Jaws?! (Here are the photos and story to prove it.)

I'm so sad for the sharks of the sea. They haven't evolved as prey. They are hunters not the hunted, right? They better learn to avoid Free Willy and Shamu because sharks are no longer at the top of the food chain.

Tiger is human too?!

The Tiger Woods voicemail his (home-wrecking) lady friend gave to the press has really got me in a tizzy today. I am sad. I am disappointed because it looks like Tiger cheated on his wife just like all the other stereotypical superstar athletes. Did you hear the voicemail? He's so guilty. Although I cannot relate to being a billionaire international athlete, which appears to include an endless amount of beautiful people trying to get into your pants at all times, I know enough to realize Tiger had four options; three of which no one gets hurt.

1. Never marry. Stay single and enjoy all the flings you desire.
2. Marry a woman who is fine with an "open" marriage. Almost like a plural marriage that the Mormons promote, but you have one wife and then girlfriends on the side. No secrets.
   
3. Marry a woman and be faithful to her until death/divorce do you part.
4. Marry a woman and claim to be faithful but use deception to keep whores on the side.

The last option is the one we're dealing with now. Tiger betrayed his wife. Tiger's mistress betrayed him by leaking the voicemail. In 15 or so years Tiger's children will read on the internet about the time Tiger got caught cheating on their mother/his wife. It seems like a lot of people are getting hurt.

Arrr Matey!

My cousins had a race car bed growing up. That was pretty cool. I think Pottery Barn Kids has just created a bed a little bit cooler. Ahoy, the pirate ship bed! How fun would it be to sleep in a pirate ship bed?! I told my husband that we need to call Pottery Barn and ask them to make this bed in a queen size, but he says it would be weird for adults to sleep in a pirate ship bed. I disagree. It would be fun. Ahoy!

I guess we need to fast-track the baby adoption process just so we can get this bed for our baby.

Arrr.

Stick Around: Things Get Interesting

My husband's great aunt is a remarkable woman. She was born in 1926. She left a tiny Texas town for Stanford University. She held on to her maiden name and practiced law in San Francisco during the heyday of male chauvinism in the 1960's. She and my husband's great uncle reared four children. They also built a mansion in the city, they owned vacation properties in the USA, they bought art, and they loved every moment of life together. Today my husband's great aunt is still enjoying life.

As a widow in her early 80's she became an extra in movies and an elderly model for print advertisements. Why not? That's her in a Kaiser Permanente print advertisement that ran in the National Geographic magazine. I love this ad. Look at the tag line in the ad: Stick Around: Things Get Interesting. If you'll notice the family surrounding her is extremely diverse. It's a great message. Her family is also extremely diverse.

I will always adore the fact that my husband's great aunt and great uncle came back to Austin, Texas in the spring of 2006 to attend their great-nephew's gay wedding ceremony. We were so broke after our wedding that we stayed at their beach house (for free) for our honeymoon. It's so nice to feel loved by the remarkable people in your family.

Tines

My husband is brilliant. He was valedictorian of his humongous high school. He graduated with high honors from UT with his engineering degree. He does calculus for fun. He has a subscription to Popular Mechanics. He can fit ten times as many dishes in the dishwasher than I can fit. The man is super smart.

Today I confessed to my husband that I want new silverware because I did not like the dull tines of our forks. His head slanted like Scooby Doo as he asked me what word I had just used. I told him 'tines'? He said he had never heard that word before in his entire life. At that point it was more logical for me to assume I had just made up that word, than it was for me to assume I had just used a real word he did not know.

Christmas Class- We've got it!

Nothing says class and sophistication like Hallmark's Cousin Eddie RV tree ornament and Sundance Catalog's 1950 Snowman plastic yard ornament. We purchased both this year to add to our existing classy Christmas decor.

Sick Man

The husband has been ill the entire Thanksgiving holiday week. Yesterday we did not leave the house. We watched the Bourne movies, which are excellent, we put up the Christmas tree and he took many hot showers and one long afternoon nap. We tried to venture out today, but after Crate and Barrel and some Indian food at Roti Grill we headed back home so he could take another long afternoon nap.

We just finished Steel Magnolias and we're starting the Kill Bill movies.

Wall-o-Tools

My husband's parents are the hub for both sides of their family. They hosted over 24 people and 4 dogs for Thanksgiving. With all the family in town we feel very fortunate to claim Bill's inside workshop as our bedroom during the holidays- our first year together we were assigned an air mattress in the entry hall of their home- the workshop is an upgrade. The workshop is quiet, it's private, and it gives us a place to corral our dogs (read: beast).

However, my husband's parents always set up the air mattress in the workshop under the wall-o-tools. I am not quiet sure what signal they are sending when they place our heads under the hatchets, hammers, screwdrivers, saws, and crowbar that dangle from peg board?! My husband's family seem to have invented the term "raise the roof" when they get together and play games; I'm just worried the wall-o-tools will fall on my head at night when everyone gets rowdy. It could happen.

This year we moved the air mattress under Bill's work bench- away from the death trap.

Wilson Birthday Cake

We held a post-Thanksgiving birthday celebration for my father last night. It's always fun to spend time with the family, and it's especially nice when my father picked up his own birthday tab. He bought the meal. We brought the cake.

Happy Birthday Wilson!

Happy Birthday Wilson! Your favorite (gay) sons love you!

Today is the day my father arrived on earth in 1953. Let us pause and celebrate this most significant day in my life- without my father (and mother!) then I would not have been created, reared, and then married-off to my husband. I am so happy my father was born. I am so happy I am one of his sons.

We had an early birthday celebration on Saturday in Austin and we will have a late birthday celebration on Friday (the chocolate cake has been ordered) of course can you really ever completely totally sufficiently celebrate the birth of your father (and mother)? I think not. We can at least try. Par-tay!

Presley says:

"Hey Uncles, I'm going to make pumpkin pie for Thanksgiving."

Thanksgiving Dishes

For Thanksgiving we're taking the follow dishes to my in-law's house:

• My mother's sweet potatoes (with Granny Smith apples as the topping!)


• Glenda's macaroni and cheese (there's no such thing as too much cheese)


• My husband's grandmother's Dark Rum Bundt Cake


• Williams-Sonoma's Cranberry Relish (I could eat it out of the jar)

It's fun to be me.

Tonight- my husband gets home!

Tomorrow- We arrive in Austin for the weekend of fun. I have worthwhile meetings during the day, and then we get to hang out with Milo & Lucy and their parents for dinner.

Saturday - We're spending the entire day in the greatest city in the world (Austin) with my parents to celebrate the birth of my father. We have tickets to the Longhorn game. Hook 'em.

Sunday - Brunch in Austin? A jog around Ladybird Lake? In route to Dallas we plan to make a pit-stop to see Owen and his mom. Owen is in Texas!

Next week- My husband has no business trips planned and it's a short work week.

Life is good.

$9,892.28

We got our 2009 property tax bill in the mail.

Do you know what $9,892.28 means to me? It is the dollars and cents we pay, annually, to our appraisal district. The money goes to the city, the school, the county, the community college and the hospital districts that claim our home. Texas does not have a state income tax but they have a sales tax and property tax. We pay both. We also pay federal income tax- every year. We pay our social security tax. We pay our medicare tax. We pay, pay, pay.

We work hard for our money, and I don't mind paying because we are contributing to our society and we're doing our equitable part to support the greatest nation in the world- the United States of America. However, when I stop and think about it I get so damn frustrated.

We live in a city, county, state, and republic that can easily tax, tax, tax its gay citizens but it does not offer them the same freedom and protection it offers its straight citizens. The husband and I DO NOT have the same freedom and protection that my brother and his wife have in this country. We pay all the same tax bills as my brother and his wife, but we don't get all the same benefits.

I am annoyed that the majority (heteros) keep taking away the rights of the minority (homos) in state elections. Gay rights will not be passed by a popular vote any time soon- gay people are the minority?! How do you win the majority of the popular vote when you're a minority?

I know how mothers and daughters must have felt before they had the right to vote in this country. This must be similar to how black Americans felt during racial segregation. We live in a country we love, but it's like this country doesn't love us back.

It's incredibly frustrating at times.

My Most Loved Music

I love great music. One of the playlists on my iPhone is especially for my most loved music. I have a rule: when I'm listening to my most loved playlist if I skip over the same song two times in a row, then I move it off the list. However, most of the songs stay on the list in perpetuity- because I really do love these songs. Here's the current list:

One - Mary J. Blige & U2

Lie to Me - Shane Mack

My Favorite Memory - Merle Haggard

Jump - Madonna

Viva la Vida - Coldplay

Baby Hold On - Dixie Chicks

Am I The Only One - Dixie Chicks

Lullaby - Dixie Chicks

Home - Michael Buble

Lost - Michael Buble

Love Lockdown - Kanye West

To Make You Feel My Love - Kris Allen

Both Sides Now - Dolly Parton & Judy Collins

Landslide - Fleetwood Mac

Sea of Heartbreak - Rosanne Cash & Bruce Springsteen

I Will Follow You Into the Dark - Death Cab for Cutie

The Luckiest - Ben Folds

Owen says:

"Hey Uncles, I arrive in Texas on Friday night. Are you ready?"

We are Owen. We are ready to have some fun with our little California nephew. Can you stay through Christmas?

It's that time of year...

My iPhone is loaded with our Christmas play list. I love to listen to Christmas music this time of year. My all-time favorite Christmas song is Darlene Love's Christmas (Baby Please Come Home). My husband's all-time favorite Christmas album is Kenny Rodgers and Dolly Parton's Once Upon a Christmas. I will agree that Dolly's Hard Candy Christmas is one of my favorites too. Merry Christmas.